


Ice Cream, You Scream

by zchenle



Category: CIX (Band)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Crack, Love, Love Confessions, M/M, yonghee just likes byounggon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-07
Updated: 2020-04-07
Packaged: 2021-03-01 16:47:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23530318
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zchenle/pseuds/zchenle
Summary: yonghee just likes byounggon so much, he’s going crazy. he knows such thoughts shouldn’t be allowed, but he can’t help it when byounggon acts so cute and flirty around him.
Relationships: Kim Yonghee/Lee Byounggon | BX
Comments: 6
Kudos: 40





	Ice Cream, You Scream

• Predebut •

“Are you leaving?”

“In a bit, just go off without me Hun,” Byounggon smiled, pushing his pouting friend out the door, “I’ll be fine, I just need to work on that one part.”

“Fine, fine, just try be home before 2am,” Seunghun huffed, pushing Byounggon on the chest playfully.

“Oh you care?” The elder teased, pinching the younger’s cheeks. Seunghun just rolled his eyes, an annoying habit he had picked up from Jinyoung, and pushed the boy back inside once more as he turned around and walked back to their dorms. 

“Idiot,” Byounggon muttered under his breath, laughing slightly. He was appreciative that Seunghun even cared as much, but that appreciation soon faded away into worry about fixing his footwork in time.

Their debut showcase was just a few days away, and he knew that he shouldn’t be so scared, but he couldn’t help the thudding in his heart as he walked into the practice room. It would all be worth it, in the end.

“1, 2, 3...” A soft voice mumbled from the corner of the room, and Byounggon turned around to see Yonghee in his own world, taking himself through the choreography of ‘Movie Star’.

“Yonghee?” He raised an eyebrow at the boy, closing the door of the room, “What are you still doing here?”

“Ah Hyung,” Yonghee turned around, his smile wide yet not meeting his eyes, “I’m just working on a small part of the chroeo, just a little stuck.”

“Stuck? I can help you.” Byounggon stepped forward, his eyes wide, “Come on, I don’t mind.”

Yonghee shook his head furiously, his cheeks turning a slight pink, “What? No, I don’t want to bother you. It’s whatever.” He nervously scratched the back of his head, looking anywhere but at the boy standing in front of him. 

“Yonghee, listen to me, it’s fine. Now come here, we can run through from the beginning.” Yonghee gulped, unsure of how to disagree with the elder, so he just nodded nervously in defeat, walking to his position. 

“Thank you Hyung,” He mumbled, so quiet that it was barely audible. Byounggon smiled, turning on the music and dashing back to his spot. Yonghee took in a deep breath, calming his nerves. He had gone through this a thousand times, what was so different this time? 

However, he fumbled straight away, missing the beginning cue, causing his cheeks to turn a dark crimson red. He looked up bewildered, not daring to speak a word in case he burst into tears from the embarrassment. 

“It’s fine, hey,” Byounggon waved his hand in front of the flustered boy, who just nodded and got up again, determined to not mess up. 

Except he did. 

He tripped during the chorus, accidently punched Gon during his part of the song, somehow started dancing to ‘What You Wanted’ and somewhere inbetween, he decided to become a rapper and take Hyunsuk’s part too. 

He was embarassed, to say the least.

Byounggon was unsure of what was happening, he assumed it was nerves since he knew that Yonghee could do it. He had watched the boy move during practice, he watched the way his shoulders moved back, his hips swayed, his legs turned out, his head rolled back, he knew Yonghee could dance great.

“Hey, you want to go out for ice cream?” Byounggon suddenly spoke. He himself didn’t know why he offered, but something about Yonghee just made him want to wrap the younger up and hold him. 

“Ice cream?” It’s like 1:30am,” Yonghee stuttered, shrugging as if he wasn’t bothered. In reality, he felt like someone was tugging at his lungs.

“So? We’re still unknown to the world, let’s mess about while we have that privledge.”

And that’s how Yonghee found himself sitting across from Byounggon at 2am, eating vanilla ice cream with sprinkles, with the city lights sparkling behind them like they were stars in the dark night sky.

Yonghee knew from the second that he had met Byounggon that he should just run back to acting school and see if they’d take him in again. He had stuttered on their first introductions, and accidentally went in for a handshake when it was supposed to be a hug. It didn’t take him too long to realise that he was developing a small crush on Byounggon as the days went by.

A lot of the times, he couldn’t help but feel outcasted. When it was late at night and Hyunsuk was lying across Yonghee’s lap asleep, and Jinyoung would giggle about how much fun they’d have once they debut. Seunghun would sigh and talk about how much he misses the stage and Byounggon would just laugh and start freestyle rapping about something stupid, Yonghee just sat quietly, caressing Hyunsuk’s hair. 

He knew he couldn’t fault the other boys for it, it wasn’t their character to leave him out on purpose, but rather their excitement that Yonghee felt wrong participating in. Still, he couldn’t help the pit in his stomach. 

It was also Byounggon that made sure Yonghee was feeling happy. He’d always eat breakfast with him, they’d talk about stupid things like movies and mess around like little kids. Whenever the late nights would drag and Yonghee sat in silence, he made it his job to provoke him until he spoke. Yonghee was thankful, so thankful, which is why he hated that his feelings for Byounggon had turned so far from friendly so quick. 

“Where are you off to now? Mars?” Byounggon snorted, waving his hand in front of the daydreaming boy, “Yah, Yonghee?”

“Huh, oh, hi,” Yonghee snapped his head up, the tips of his ears matching the strawberry ice cream Byounggon was licking. 

Byounggon sighed, poking the younger boy’s cheeks, “Smile, I miss it.”

“You do?” Yonghee bit his lip, pushing his hair out of his eyes as he placed a spoonful of ice cream in his mouth. The elder nodded, licking some of his own ice cream now.

“What’s on your mind? You’ve been spacing out a lot,” He asked, his hand reaching out to stroke Yonghee’s arm comfortably. The younger froze under his touch, sighing slightly, “If you’re thinking you’ll bother me, you won’t.”

Yonghee snorted, looking up at Byounggon now, “You know me so well, huh?” He leaned forward, quickly taking a spoonful of the elder’s ice cream, “Hmm, yum.”

“Not well enough, not as well as I’d like to,” He shrugged, leaning back and pushing his ice cream forward, “It’s yours.”

“What, why?” Yonghee pushed the ice cream back, pouting, “It’s yours.”

“I’ll eat it if you tell me what’s in that pretty head of yours, and don’t say your brain.” 

Yonghee laughed, rolling his eyes at the elder’s daftness. He pushed his spoon around, glancing up at Byounggon cautiously. He felt his hand squeeze his arm reassuringly, a smile on his face. Yonghee believed Byounggon must have been a God in his past life to look how he does now.

“I just- I don’t... Well.”

“Take your time, we have all night.” 

“I feel like I don’t deserve to even debut with you guys,” Yonghee laughed bitterly, feeling himself beginning to get choked up already, “Everyone went through so much to even be here, so much time and training and, I’m just here.”

“Yonghee...” 

“I don’t deserve to be excited like you do, you deserve this and-“

“Yonghee stop it, that’s bullshit.” Byounggon cut him off abruptly, shaking his head, “I can’t believe you could even think that, you’re so special to me and this group.” 

Yonghee couldn’t help but feel his stomach twist at each word Byounggon was saying. 

“You deserve this too, you stay up all night practicing, and those pretty vocals of yours, it’d be a sin to keep them hidden away.”

“Why don’t I feel it? I feel so...” Yonghee sighed, rubbing his eyes now. He glanced down at the floor, his leg bouncing up and down underneath the table. 

“I know, you don’t have to say anymore.” Byounggon stood up, grabbing his hand and pulling him out the door hurriedly, “Come, let’s go exploring.”

Yonghee knew what love felt like. He felt it from his parents everyday before school when his mum would make him his favourite sandwich. He felt it when his girlfriend broke up with him and his best friend stayed the whole night with him. He also felt it when they had eventually kissed. He felt it when Jinyoung would run over and hug him tightly or when Seunghun would sneak him the last pizza slice. He felt it now, walking through the empty park in silence, his heart hammering in his chest.

“What do you think about love?” He asked quietly. His question hung in the air, a wave of awkwardness washing over Yonghee.

“Love? A bit random, don’t you think?” Byounggon tilted his head, raising an eyebrow at the smaller boy.

Yonghee shrugged, glad that it was dark so Byounggon couldn’t see his bright red face, “Just curious.”

“I think love is beautiful, it must be so nice to just fall freely for someone, with no worries,” he sighed, stopping by a tree. He leaned against it, watching Yonghee carefully, “But I don’t really have time for it now. I mean, I can’t let my future get messed up by something so unpredictable as love.”

“Yeah, exactly,” Yonghee mumbled, swallowing hard. He turned around, glancing over the skyline of the city, and back at the man that stood behind him. He was right, of course. Yonghee was being careless throwing around such words and ideas.

“Back home?” Byounggon asked after a while. Yonghee nodded, and the two trailed after the moon on their way back to the dorm, in silence. 

• After CIX’s first win •

“I can’t even...” Hyunsuk trailed off, gripping onto Byounggon tightly, hiding his teary eyes from everyone. 

“Well fuck,” Seunghun laughed, clinging onto Yonghee’s arm, letting out a shaky breath, “We just did that? No way.”

“Yeah, no way,” Jinyoung pressed a hand to his forehead, eyes wide open, “I’m so proud of us.” He giggled, wrapping his arms around Hyunsuk and Byounggon in a tight hug.

“Hey, what about us,” Yonghee pouted, resulting in a snort from Jinyoung.

“I said us, didn’t I? Come here.”

Yonghee grabbed Seunghun’s hand and they were both immediately pulled into the massive hug. Byounggon grabbed Yonghee’s waist, pulling him down so that his lips were right above Yonghee’s ears.

“I’m so proud of you, I told you, you deserve this,” he whispered. Yonghee glanced up at him, grinning widely. He didn’t know whether his ears had turned red because of how close he was to Byounggon right now or the heat from everyone else, but he figured it was a mixture of both. 

He let go of Seunghun’s hand quickly, wrapping both his arms around Gon in a tight hug, tears leaking from his eyes, “So do you, you really do.”

“I think we deserve some pizza,” Seunghun announced after they had all calmed down, now sitting on the sofas. 

“I think we deserve eight of them,” Hyunsuk rested his head on Seunghun’s lap, his cheeks flushed from the crying. Byounggon leaned his head against Yonghee’s, licking the boys cheek slightly.

“Ah, what?” Yonghee jumped up, touching the side of his face in shock, “What?” 

“I’m hungry,” Byounggon shrugged, grabbing Yonghee’s hand to pull him down once again, “Don’t move.”

“Don’t lick me,” Yonghee complained, but his thoughts were now blurry from the feeling of Byounggon’s hand in his.

“It’s on me, pizza’s on me,” Jinyoung screamed suddenly, jumping up and down, “And, and, and we can eat something else too!”

“Jinyoung’s opening his wallet huh?” Hyunsuk smiled cheekily, stretching out his hands, “It’s time to bring out my list.”

“Everyone but Hyunsuk gets a choice,” Jinyoung yelled again, ignoring Hyunsuk’s constant whining, “And it’s Jinyoung Hyung dummy.”

“Jinyoung Hyung, can you get me some ice cream?” Byounggon pouted, looking up at Jinyoung teasingly, “Actually I think I’ll take Yonghee with me later, so maybe just add in some burgers.” The younger just groaned, sitting back down in defeat. 

Yonghee shook his head at their stupidness, and looked down at his and Byounggon’s intertwined hands. He felt dizzy, he felt sick, he felt sick of feeling this way. He had to stop the thoughts of the future before they consumed him. This was all just friendly love after all.

• Somewhere after Movie Star promotions and before Numb •

“Who stole my biscuits?” Seunghun yelled into the main room, plopping himself onto the sofa next to Jinyoung, “Was it you?”

“Me? Why would I want your biscuits?” Jinyoung huffed, crossing his arms. He smiled slyly, trying to be discrete. 

“Oh, yeah?” Seunghun grinned mischievously, pushing Jinyoung down onto the sofa with his legs before tickling his sides. Jinyoung let out a scream of laughter, shaking his head as he tried to kick Seunghun away. 

“Tickle fight?” Byounggon shook his head as he walked in, sneaking behind the two fo them. He gripped Seunghun’s sides suddenly, making the boy let out a loud yell and fall off. Jinyoung burst out laughing, little giggles leaving his mouth every few seconds. 

“Stop, wrong person,” he groaned, climbing back onto the sofa. Jinyoung wiggled his tongue, grabbing a biscuit from under the cushion and biting it in front of Seunghun’s face, smirking tauntingly.

“Why you little-“ 

“Hyung, where are my biscuits?” They all turned around to see Hyunsuk standing there unamused, “Wait, those are mine.” He huffed, glaring at the biscuit between Jinyoung’s fingers.

“No, it’s Seunghun Hyung’s biscuit!” He exclaimed, throwing the remains of the biscuit at him.

“I... Let me explain, run Jinyoung,” He screamed, running off in the opposite direction. Hyunsuk grabbed a pillow angrily, stomping off in the direction the two boys ran in. 

“Never a quiet day, huh?” Yonghee grinned, now entering the Biscuit War free zone. He sat next to Byounggon who was aimlessly scrolling through his phone.

“I think it’s a good thing, these past few weeks have been tiring,” Byounggon rested his head on Yonghee’s shoulder, licking his lips, “I can’t wait for the next comeback though.”

“Always thinking of the future, huh?” Yonghee stroked his fingers over Byounggon’s hand, sighing. His feelings had not disappeared at all, and every second he spent with Byounggon, he felt them get bigger and deeper. 

“What else would I think of?” Byounggon sighed, glancing at Yonghee, “What’s on your mind, hm?”

Yonghee shook his head, pushing Byounggon off playfully, “Wouldn’t you like to know?”

“Well yeah, I did ask,” Byounggon pulled Yonghee back down next to him, pouting, “Don’t go, just stay.”

“I always will,” Yonghee mumbled, his heart pounding his ribcage as Byounggon stretched to grab the remote, starting to flick through the channels, “You want to get ice cream tonight?”

Byounggon grinned, nodding excitedly, “Well we can’t let our tradition die all of a sudden.”

“Hyungs, get a room,” Hyunsuk snorted, entering the room once more with a packet of biscuits in his hand. He stretched himself out on the couch next to them.

“This is a room, doofus.” Byounggon threw a pillow at the younger, laughing as he dropped his biscuits. A few seconds later, Seunghun and Jinyoung trailed into the room with messy hair, clutching pillows to their chests.

“Hey Yonghee, do you have a rash? Your face is all red.”

“Huh? What, no, I’m fine Jinyoung,” Yonghee stuttered, fanning himself with his hand. Byounggon tilted his head to look up at Yonghee, a concerned look crossing over his face.

“It is quite red, what happened?” Byounggon sat up, furrowing his eyebrows in confusion, “You were fine a minute ago.”

Jinyoung snickered, sitting on top of Hyunsuk’s legs as Yonghee glared at him. He could feel Byounggon’s gaze on him, and his cheeks just felt increasingly warmer as the seconds passed. 

“Just, I need to... dance, or else I feel stuffy, yeah, let’s dance,” Yonghee jumped up suddenly, shaking his hips awkwardly. 

Seunghun grinned, letting out a loud, over enthusiastic sigh, “You owe me one,” He whispered, as he pulled up the other boys to dance. 

“Hope your dancing rash clears up Yonghee,” Jinyoung winked as he bumped hips with Byounggon, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. 

“Me too,” Byounggon smiled, reaching over to take Yonghee’s hands, as they all danced together. 

• Somewhere in the middle of Numb promotions •

Somedays, Yonghee just wanted to disappear. He wished to be a star in the sky, sparkling but so far. Yet he was still here. 

“Fuck,” He mumbled, sitting up on his bed. He sighed, looking up the ceiling. Somedays, Yonghee wondered what it would be like to just blink out of existence. He didn’t really have a reason for the aching in his chest, but it existed there to haunt him. 

He couldn’t help but feel alone. That was far from the case, he was with the boys all the time, he had his manager and all the staff with him, who all cared for him. He still felt alone. 

Somedays, Yonghee felt like the former shell of a person he once was. Most days, Yonghee himself wasn’t sure who that was. He spent a lot of time reliving his memories, and even though he has a lot of good memories, his mind would always drift off to the bad.

To the time his best friend broke up with him, to the time where his parents were disappointed to know he was leaving acting behind, to the time when he tripped and scraped his knee, to the time when he stood under the stars with Gon who unknowingly shattered his heart.

Somedays, Yonghee just craves love, he just craves the feeling of being wanted, and somedays, Byounggon is right there.

“Yonghee, are you awake?” A voice whispered from behind the door, following by a series of musical knocks.

“It’s open,” He called out, wiping his eyes for any stray tears. Byounggon stepped into the room, closing the door quietly. He was dressed in his pyjamas and a wide smile, one that make Yonghee’s heart break piece by piece. He pushed himself to the side of the bed, patting the spot beside him.

“What’s on your mind, I can tell you’re bothered,” Gon climbed into bed, pulling the covers over himself. 

“I don’t know, I’m just feeling down is all,” Yonghee smiled at him, who just looked back at Yonghee with a concerned look, “Don’t look at me like that.”

“You know, you mean a lot to me,” Byounggon whispered into the air, wrapping his arms around Yonghee’s small frame, “A lot, so don’t doubt yourself. You are such an important part of me and our whole group.”

Yonghee sniffed, nodding. He remained quiet as Byounggon whispered goodnight and a promise to get ice cream together but his mind was full of thoughts. He was screaming inside. 

“You’re important to me. More than you’ll know.” Yonghee whispered into the air. He could taste the saltiness of his tears, he could taste the loneliness that consumed him, he could feel himself slowly drowning in his thoughts.

“Yonghee? Hey, hey, what’s with the tears?” Byounggon lifted his head up, still drowsy. He lifted his hand to Yonghee’s cheeks slowly, wiping away each tear as they fell, “Come here.” He pulled the younger into a tight hug, feeling him cry into his chest. Byounggon sighed, closing his eyes as he felt Yonghee’s shaky figure underneath him, “I’m right here, I promise.” He whispered, only to be greeted by the deafening silence. He smiled bitterly, squeezing the small boy between his arms tightly, “I promise.”

“Should we just leave them?” Hyunsuk mumbled, looking from Jinyoung to Seunghun. Both of them shrugged. The sun was peeking through the holes in the curtains now, and Jinyoung made a mental note to mention buying Yonghee new curtains to their manager.

“Let’s just go and let the lovebirds have some space,” Seunghun pushed the two boys out the door, smiling at the sight of the ones wrapped up in each other on the bed.

“They’re cute,” Jinyoung nodded to himself, glancing back at the door, “Well, they’ll be less cute when they realise we left without them and ate all the breakfast.”

“Exactly, so hurry up!”

• Well after Numb Promotions •

“Hyung, can you help me?” Yonghee pouted, looking at Seunghun with pleading eyes. They were told they were going to do a special stage, and Yonghee was nervous more than anything.

“Of course silly,” Seunghun smiled, squeezing Yonghee’s cheeks with a smile, “Let me grab Hyunsuk, he was unsure on something too.”

“I wonder if he knows I’m not five,” Yonghee snorted, laughing slightly.

“He just likes to baby people,” Byounggon shrugged, patting Yonghee’s head, “And you are really baby.”

Yonghee scoffed, shaking his head. He wasn’t even sure what that would mean, so he didn’t know why he suddenly felt flustered, “People do say that you two are the unofficial parents.”

“Me and him?” Byounggon raises an eyebrow, making a somewhat weird face, “I’d rather it be me and you.” 

Yonghee’s face most likely resembled a tomato now, as he laughed, pushing Byounggon away slightly, “I’m too young for kids.” He didn’t know what to say, he was left rather speechless with his stomach now in knots. Byounggon just smiled at him.

“Jinyoung went over it with Hyunsuk already, so you wanna do it now?” Seunghun walked over, pouting at the floor, “Or we could just all go over it together.”

“Su-”

“It’s fine, I’ll help him,” Byounggon suddenly shouted, pushing Seunghun in the opposite direction, “Go be busy somewhere else, I got this.” Seunghun glanced back, raising his eyebrows before shrugging, walking back to where Hyunsuk and Jinyoung were dancing.

Yonghee looked up at Byounggon, who just grinned and placed his water bottle down, “Let’s start then.”

It was currently 1am, and Byounggon was considering getting a body double to learn the dance for him. Hyunsuk was laying next to him, watching their dance practice on Yonghee’s ipad, and Yonghee was now sitting up, frustrated. 

He got up and walked out of the door without another word, leaving the other two boys alone to their thoughts. Seunghun and Jinyoung had called an early night and decided that coming in for the morning would be better. Byounggon disagreed with this completely. 

“Hyung, I’m scared,” Hyunsuk spoke after a while, turning his head slightly to the side, “This is such a new dance and what if I mess it up?”

Byounggon sat up, pulling the younger boy up with him. Hyunsuk pouted, rubbing his eyes with his hands.

“Come on now, you’re going to do amazing, you’re already picking this up quicker than the rest of us. Don’t doubt your skills,” He squeezed Hyunsuk’s arm, before pulling him up quickly, “Let’s go get a snack, it’ll cheer you up.”

It was at that moment that Yonghee walked back in, overhearing the last part of their conversation.

“Can we get ice cream?” Hyunsuk jumped up, enveloping Byounggon in a huge hug, a bright smile back on his face.

“I mean,” Byounggon bit the inside of his cheekc unsure what to say. He usually went with Yonghee at this hour, but Hyunsuk’s upset face kept flashing in his mind, “If you promise not to get ill,” the elder laughed, turning around to see Yonghee standing awkwardly at the doorway, “You want to come for ice cream too?”

Yonghee immediately shook his head, gripping the doorknob tightly, “I think I’m going to go and sleep.” 

Byounggon glanced from Hyunsuk then to Yonghee, raising an eyebrow, “Alright, see you.” He walked out with Hyunsuk trailing behind, who stopped to flick Yonghee’s forehead playfully. 

Yonghee was now just sitting on the sofas in their dorms, looking around cluelessly in the dark. He wasn’t sure what the gut wrenching, bitter feeling in his body meant. He couldn’t be jealous, Hyunsuk was a little brother to everyone. He wondered if Yonghee was just a little brother to Byounggon too. 

He knew it was pointless to be upset. It wouldn’t solve anything, but he couldn’t help the feeling from spreading as he thought about Byounggon doing their tradition with someone else. It hurt him more than he’d like to admit.

“Yonghee? Why are you awake?” Jinyoung stepped into the room, the moonlight from the window making his figure appear against the darkness of the room. Yonghee shrugged, looking away from the younger boy, unsure of what to do.

“Where’s the other two?” He asked, grabbing a pillow and sitting next to Yonghee. He pressed the pillow to his chest, scrunching his nose slightly.

“They went to get ice cream,” Yonghee mumbled. Jinyoung raised an eyebrow, nodding slowly. 

“I can see the jealousy on your face and we are sat in the dark,” he laughed slightly, his hands poking at Yonghee’s cheeks, “And now you’re red again.”

Yonghee pushed away Jinyoung’s hands, shaking his head quickly, “I’m not jealous, why would I be?”

“Come on, everyone knows that it’s yours and Byounggon’s thing to do,” Jinyoung leaned his head against Yonghee’s shoulder, “But Hyunsuk is just a brother to Byounggon, no need to be so jealous.”

Yonghee nodded, letting out a deep breath. Jinyoung was right, of course. “Do you think I’m like a brother to him?” Yonghee spoke after a few minutes of silence. Jinyoung’s head felt heavy on his shoulder, and for a moment he thought the younger boy fell asleep.

“I think you’re someone really special to him,” Jinyoung mumbled, standing up now, “And that we should both go to bed.” Yonghee nodded, letting Jinyoung walk off now. He was alone with his thoughts once again.

It was around 4am when the door opened, and Yonghee shot up on the couch. He hadn’t realised where he had fallen asleep. The lights for the room turned on, making the boy release a weird, inhuman screech, “So bright.”

“Why are you here?” Byounggon asked, grabbing Yonghee’s hand and pulling him up, “Let’s get you to bed.”

“How was ice cream?” Yonghee asked, sighing.

“Ice cream? We went out for donuts instead,” Byounggon opened the door of Yonghee’s room, pushing the boy inside and following behind, a smile on his face, “I bought you some back, I’ll hide them behind the lettuce in the fridge.”

“Oh. Thanks, a lot,” Yonghee smiled, climbing into bed. Byounggon didn’t say anything afterwards. He turned off the lights and closed the room door. 

Yonghee let out a sigh of relief, a smile on his face. He suddenly felt light as he closed his eyes, thinking about the words Byounggon had just said. He felt ashamed for even being jealous in the first place, especially when Byounggon had been so nice, ignoring Yonghee’s weird behaviour from before. 

He even saved him a donut. 

• After Black Out performance •

“Hey Hyung,” Yonghee glanced up at Byounggon, who just shrugged and starting taking off his makeup. They all had rushed back to the dorms after their performance, not even letting the stylists help them. Yonghee grabbed a makeup wipe, glancing at the elder boy in the mirror, “What’s up?”

Byounggon groaned slightly, running a hand through his brightly coloured hair, “Jinyoung’s upset about his performance, Seunghun’s denying that he’s in pain and Hyunsuk won’t come out of his room because now he thinks he did bad too.” He sighed, dabbing the makeup wipe under his eyes, staring at the mirror.

“Those things aren’t your fault Hyung,” Yonghee touched his shoulder, jumping back slightly when Byounggon slammed his hands on the work surface.

“I’m the leader though, and I can’t even cheer any of them up and none of then will even open their room doors,” Byounggon rested his elbows against the surface, a frustrated look imprinted on his face, “What kind of leader does that make me?” 

Yonghee was unsure of what to say. He didn’t know how to say the words that were in his brain. Byounggon looked up at him, a weak smile on his face, “But that’s not anything for you to worry about.” He grabbed the packet of makeup wipes and walked out of the bathroom, and a few seconds later he heard Gon’s room door shut. 

“Fuck,” Yonghee muttered, opening the cabinet drawer to grab some more makeup wipes, “What the fuck do I do?”

Byounggon wasn’t really a person to self pity, which is why he couldn’t even believe he was lying in bed in his pyjamas feeling sorry for himself. He was unsure why, it wasn’t the time to be feeling sad about himself right now. 

Yet he couldn’t help it. He wondered how he could even be so stupid to be sitting here when three of his own members were trapped in their own rooms doing the same thing. Not to mention how he left Yonghee all alone. He didn’t even want to think anymore. 

He sighed, sitting up in his bed and glancing at his door. He knew that he should go out and see what the other boys were doing, but neither of his legs were moving. 

Suddenly the door opened, and Yonghee entered holding two ice cream cones. He reached over and handed one to Gon, before shutting the door behind him.

“Move up,” He demanded, and when Byounggon finally obliged, he jumped into bed, smiling at him. Gon ignored the feeling in this stomach.

“You should not be sitting here self pitying, young man,” Yonghee raised an eyebrow at Gon, who just shrugged sheepishly, “I don’t really know how it must feel to have so many people depend on you in that way, but you’re doing an amazing job, I promise.” 

Gon sighed, a small smile threatening to break out on his face. He continued licking his ice cream, feeling his words stuck at his throat.

“You’re not in control of how they feel or what they do, it’s not your fault if they’re feeling sad,” Yonghee continued, taking one of Gon’s hands in his own. Byounggon looked up at him, his eyes wide in confusion and shock.

“You’re a person too, it’s okay to be sad. Just come find me whenever you are. The other boys, they’re going to be fine, no ones first performance ever goes quite right.” Yonghee turned so his body was fully facing Byounggon now, smiling widely at him, “You’re a great leader, who else could deal with Jinyoung’s morning tantrums? That boy is a perfectionist, he’ll be fine soon.”

“I know, I just wish I could make him feel better quicker,” Byounggon pouted, avoiding Yonghee’s eyes.

“Go talk to him, that’s all he needs,” Yonghee encouraged, leaning back against the pillows, “Hyunsuk is just going through the last of his teenage angst, but you know he’s never sad for too long.” 

“Yeah, you’re right,” he mumbled, squeezing Yonghee’s hand tightly. 

“I’ll talk to Hyung for you. Injuries happen all the time and his is small, he just needs a few words of encouragement.”

Byounggon smiled, looking at the boy that sat in front of him. He didn’t know what to say anymore, so he just pulled Yonghee in for a tight hug, “Thank you, thank you so much.”

Yonghee’s cheeks were now a dusty pink, as he shrugged, looking down at the floor. 

“I guess I should go talk to Jinyoung,” Byounggon ate the last of his ice cream cone, jumping up from the bed. Yonghee nodded, watching the elder cautiously. 

“Thank you,” Gon grinned. His heart was hammering against his chest now, his mouth dry from nervousness. He quickly leaned down and pressed a small kiss on Yonghee’s cheek. Yonghee froze, as the elder ran out of his room.

He sat like that for a few minutes, remembering the feeling of Byounggon’s lips for a few more moments. He felt like his cheeks were on fire. 

“You look like a stop sign,” Hyunsuk poked his head into the room a while later, sticking his tongue out teasingly, “I ordered food, it’ll be here soon.” He left without another word, leaving Yonghee to his thoughts once again.

“What are you doing Gon?” he muttered to himself while climbing out of bed, making his way to Seunghun’s room. 

• Somewhere before Revival •

“Man, ribbons? That’s wild,” Hyunsuk gasped, holding them in his hands. He waved them around excitedly, giggling. 

“This is going to be so cool,” Jinyoung grinned, wrapping it around his hand, “Wow.”

“Where’s Yonghee?” Byounggon asked abruptly, looking around for the younger boy. 

Seunghun snorted, throwing a balled up ribbon at Byounggon’s face, “He’s gone to the toilet.” 

At that moment, the practice room door opened and Yonghee entered, waving at the other boys. He jogged over, placing himself in between Jinyoung and Byounggon. 

“These are cool,” he picked one up, whipping Hyunsuk’s back with it lightly.

“Ah, Hyung,” Hyunsuk groaned as Yonghee laughed, shrugging his shoulder. Byounggon shook his head, collecting the ribbons from the boys and putting them back into the box. 

“Let’s go out for food, I’m hungry,” Byounggon pouted, kicking the box to the side of the room, “And I think Jinyoung just said he’d pay.”

“I never said that,” Jinyoung pouted, pushing Byounggon slightly.

“Did I hear Jinyoung’s paying? Let’s get some food,” Hyunsuk yelled, followed by Seunghun grabbing the younger blue haired boy and dragging him out the door. 

“Let’s go,” Byounggon grabbed Yonghee’s hand, pulling the boy out the door with him, and Yonghee couldn’t help but smile. 

“Fuck, I’m stuffed,” Yonghee groaned, patting his stomach lightly. He glanced at the other boys, who all nodded, rubbing their bellies in unison.

“And I’m broke,” Jinyoung whined, punching Yonghee’s shoulder slightly. Yonghee giggled, pushing the younger with a little more force. Jinyoung wobbled slightly, letting out a loud huff as he pushed Yonghee back. 

Yonghee yelled as he lost his balance and fell onto the floor, groaning in pain. He clutched his arm, taking in a deep breath to stop the tears.

“Ah Yonghee, are you okay?” Jinyoung asked, frowning at the elder, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to-”

“What the fuck Jinyoung?” Byounggon yelled, pushing Jinyoung away as he crouched down, “Do you even have a brain? What’s wrong with you?” 

“Gon calm down, it was an accident,” Seunghun grabbed Jinyoung’s arm, pulling him behind him, “Come on, Yonghee’s fine. Right?”

“Yonghee?” Hyunsuk asked, poking his shoulder.

Yonhee groaned, turning over and holding his arm tightly. Byounggon cussed, grabbing tissues from his pocket and pressing it lightly against Yonghee’s cut.

“It’s fine Jinyoung,” Yonghee smiled at the younger who just nodded, a frown still etched in his face.

“It’s not fine, what the fuck, look, he’s bleeding,” Byounggon glared at Jinyoung, who took a step back, clutching onto Seunghun’s arm, “Get him away from here.”

“Gon- Okay, whatever, come on, you too Hyunsuk,” Seunghun sighed, grabbing both their hands and leading them down the road. Byounggon sighed, helping Yonghee up. The younger wobbled slightly, using Byounggon’s shoulders as support as they walked over to a bench, where they sat silently as Byounggon cleaned up the blood on his arm.

“I’m fine, it’s just a little blood, you didn’t have to be so mean,” Yonghee huffed, wincing as Byounggon patted the wound. He couldn’t help but feel guilty when thinking of Jinyoung’s scared face. 

“I just don’t like seeing you hurt,” the elder mumbled in response, not looking up at the younger’s eyes.

“But you hurt me all the time,” Yonghee muttered under his breath, leaning his head back. The stars were still twinkling, the sound of cars in the distance becoming background music to his racing thoughts.

“What?” Gon stood up suddenly, looking down at the younger in shock, “I do?”

“Huh? No, you heard wrong.” Yonghee stuttered, shaking his head quickly, “Don’t worry, I’m being stupid.”

“Then what? Do I really hurt you?” Byounggon sighed, tugging at his hair in frustration, “Talk to me, please.” Yonghee sat in silence, looking down at the ground hopelessly. He could already feel everything shatter around him.

“Yonghee please, say something. You can’t just sit there quietly.” Byounggon yelled, kicking a few stones into the road. He sat back down on the bench after a few seconds, resting his head in his hands. The few seconds of quiet became a few minutes, as Yonghee glanced around the empty road.

“I like you,” Yonghee mumbled, gripping his shirt tightly.

“What?” Byounggon looked up at him, an eyebrow raised.

“I like you, and not in the way I like the other boys. I really like you,” Yonghee stood up, brushing off the dirt that was on his clothes, “Fuck, I’m sorry.” 

He turned around and began walking off without another word, tears running down his cheeks. He wished he wasn’t so stupid for having such thoughts and feelings. 

Suddenly he felt his arm being tugged and he was pulled into an alleyway. His back was pressed up against a wall as Byounggon stood in front of him, breathless.

“What are you do-“

“I like you too. I like you so much and I was so scared Yonghee,” His eyes pleaded with Yonghee’s as he took a step back, “I like everything about you. I like your smile and that funny thing you do with your tongue. I like your eyes when you’re happy, I like watching you dance, I like how you laugh, I like how you make me feel, I like how you treat everyone so good, I like how you treat me.” He breathed out, pushing himself against the wall on the opposite side, “I like you so much.”

Yonghee stood frozen. He was shocked, to say the least, and he didn’t know how to move or what to say after Gon’s confession. He glanced up at the boy, who stood their staring at the stars now, tears running down his face.

“Stay with me,” Yonghee spoke into the air, wiping the tears from his eyes as he smiled. 

The elder boy looked down now, his mouth wide open at the younger’s words.

“Always Yonghee, always,” Byounggon grinned, running over to the boy as he hugged him tightly, “You want to go for ice cream?” 

“Only if I get a kiss on top.”

“Jinyoungie, come out now,” Seunghun sat against the door, knocking on it for the seventh time that minute, “It’s fine, really.”

“Maybe we should just leave him alone,” Hyunsuk sat down next to Seunghun, shrugging his shoulders, “Where did those two even go?”

“Right here,” Byounggon yelled from the doorway, closing the door behind him. Yonghee placed down a box on the counter and walked over to where the two boys were sitting lifelessly on the floor.

“Jinyoung, it’s fine, i’m fine,” He called out, knocking on the door. Byounggon stood behind him, nervously playing with his fingers. 

“I didn’t mean to get so angry, I’m sorry Jinyoungie,” he called out, leaning his head against the wall, “I have something to tell you guys.”

“Yeah?” Seunghun raised an eyebrow at him suspiciously, kicking his leg slightly, “Is it an apology?”

“Shut up,” Byounggon snorted, glancing at Yonghee who just smiled at him reassuringly, “It’s uh- Well, me and Yonghee are together now.”

A crash came from inside the room, causing Hyunsuk to jump up from outside the door. The lock clicked and the door opened, Jinyoung’s face peaking out.

“You guys are together?” 

“Yeah, we are,” Yonghee blushed, hiding his face from the other boys. Seunghun stood up, clapping his hands excitedly.

“I guess it’s all thanks to you Jinyoung,” He shrugged, grabbing the younger’s hand and pulling him into a hug, “I’m fine, see. Thank you.”

Byounggon wrapped his arms around the two boys, licking Jinyoung’s cheek teasingly, “I’ll buy you donuts, I’m sorry for yelling.”

“Hey do we get any?” Seunghun jumped up, hugging the three boys tightly. Hyunsuk ran into them, causing them all to tumble over into a mess of bodies on the floor.

“Ah, watch out for his arm,” Byounggon huffed, grabbing Yonghee protectively. Hyunsuk laughed, shaking his head at the two of them.

“Maybe it was a mistake getting them together,” Jinyoung commented, making a disgusted face at Byounggon, “You’re already too icky.”

“Hey, leave my boyfriend alone,” Yonghee huffed, kicking Jinyoung’s leg slightly. 

“Boyfriend?” Seunghun, Hyunsuk and Byounggon shouted at the same time, causing Yonghee to whine and cover his face. They just laughed, shaking their heads at how embarrassed he was.

• A random time in their lives •

“Hey, I watched your VLive,” Yonghee called out as Hyunsuk and Seunghun entered the room, “Did you have any of the food left?” 

“Your boyfriend beat you to it,” Seunghun shrugged, walking past Yonghee to his room, “I’m sure he’ll want more food so watch out.”

“What does that mean? Hyung!” Yonghee yelled, throwing a pillow at his retreating body. 

“Gross,” Hyunsuk scrunched up his nose, grabbing a packet of crisps from the cabinet and walking into his room, “Goodnight Hyung.”

“Goodnight,” Yonghee let out a deep breath, laying down on the couch. He was quite surprised at how life had turned out.

He had never felt so happy, so wanted, so needed. He felt like he didn’t deserve such happiness, but Byounggon was helping him get through such thoughts and insecurities. He was helping a lot.

Yonghee just wanted to scream because of how happy he was. He used to want to be a star in the night sky, but now he realises that Byounggon is his star, always shining for him. He couldn’t be more thankful.

“Baby? Why are you still awake?” Byounggon’s voice snapped him out of his thoughts, as he leaned up to see a Gon hovering above him, “Let’s get you to bed.”

“Gon?” Yonghee spoke, looking up at the elder with wide eyes.

“Yeah?” 

“I like you, a lot.” Yonghee blushed, giggling slightly at the way his heart was beating quicker.

“I like you as well Yonghee. So much.” Byounggon grinned, sliding his hand into the younger’s. He bought their hands to his face, kissing Yonghee’s knuckles delicately, watching how the younger blushed increasingly harder at every kiss, “Always.”

“Ah my eyes, this is a public area” Jinyoung yelled suddenly, throwing a pillow at the two of them as he entered the room.

“Get back to bed young man!”

**Author's Note:**

> sorry for any mistakes i made! stay streaming revival and numb! <3


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